Power struggles and manipulation in romantic relationships

Are you the type who always apologizes? Do you feel guilty and understand that you are the one who is apologizing, not understanding what happened, when in fact you were right? You even feel so bad that you cannot explain to yourself, can’t you be completely happy and peaceful? However, when you look at your relationship from the outside; You seem like a couple who understand each other, manage each other, don’t cheat, don’t lie, get along, and maybe they are. So where did this feeling of unhappiness come from? Could this sound be the strong footsteps of impending danger?

“Every established relationship is actually a relationship of power.” There is a saying. Perhaps this is what is inherent in all of us by nature. In 1971, American psychologist Philip Zimbardo conducted an experiment at Stanford University to study people’s need for power; After choosing 24 undergraduate students, he set up the basement of the university’s psychology building as a real prison, giving some of the 24 selected roles of prisoners, and some of them as guards. At first it all started as a game, but when everyone got too carried away with their roles, everything happened as it really was, even some of the guards began to show sadistic tendencies towards the subjects, and after only 6 days prof. . Zimbardo had to close the prison. Things are out of control. The will to power is an intrinsic quality. There is no right or wrong here. At the heart of humanity’s struggle for survival is the will to power. That’s why a person that we think we know very well becomes a different person when he comes to certain positions and puts his hand and becomes a completely different person, and we cannot understand it.

So, should we take it naturally and live as it comes to us? Of course not, would we be any different from other living beings if not for our ability to learn and manage ourselves, our survival instincts and the traits we need to develop that make us human?

We may face conscious or unconscious power struggles or manipulation in our relationships, and we may not even realize it. Emotional manipulators are often not our strangers, but our favorite and most trusted people. Our mother, father, brothers and sisters, relatives, friends, spouses. So don’t look far for the killer, every killer has a relationship with a victim and meets a victim.

So how do we notice? Of course, this is a very long and multivariate topic, but in the simplest terms; something wrong or wrong has been done to you, even a small thing, something very insignificant; imagine a scene like being late, forgetting while you are the party being kept waiting or being neglected, or let’s put it simply, you suddenly find yourself pitying the other party, even acting up, ruining the day/night and apologizing his whims. What was he doing, what was I thinking?Here is the topic. You are so emotionally manipulated that you end upI’m sorry I made you lie to meYou have hit the mark”. No matter what you go through, if you are constantly apologizing and doing unfair things, you are living with a manipulator and admitting it or not, you are being emotionally tormented. A person who goes on with his life, being psychologically damaged and traumatized by emotional torture, may not even realize that he is dying day by day, as he accepts it as a natural process of life.

The fish does not remember the sea, it just lives.
When should he remember?
When you can no longer live the way you used to…
The waters are either polluted or have begun to recede.

Remember the sea before the water becomes polluted or recedes.

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