Dr. 7 steps to recovery according to Gabor Mate

One of the best-selling authors and listeners of recent years. Dr. Gabor Mate, He is known for his expertise in a variety of areas including addiction, stress, trauma, and child development. Instead of offering quick fixes to complex problems, it provides an instructive look at how people can improve themselves and their environment, based on scientific research, case studies, and personal insight and experience. Gabor MateIn her book When the Body Says No: The Price of Hidden Stress, she offers 7 steps to recovery.

Dr. Gabor MateHealth is based on three pillars: “Body, soul and spiritual connection. To ignore any of them means to cause disease, imbalance. To heal, restore or maintain health, you need to look back at yourself and analyze your internal states. “Following the 7 principles of healing helps us grow emotionally.”

Here is the bestselling and widely circulated book When the Body Says No: The Cost of Hidden Stress. Gabor Mate7 recovery steps described.

1. Acceptance

Acceptance is simply the willingness to understand and accept the way things are. -not letting him determine our approach to the future- It’s the courage to let it fill our understanding. Acceptance does not require us to continue uncomfortable conditions; requires a refusal to “deny” the way things are right now. And it challenges our deeply rooted beliefs that we are not worthy enough or “good enough” to be complete.

Acceptance also means having a “compassionate relationship” with oneself. With so many things to do, the more compassionate you are with yourself, the more you can give yourself the best chance possible. Compassionate self-curiositycompassionate curiosity) does not mean that we love everything we learn about ourselves; it simply means looking at ourselves with an unbiased acceptance that we want to give to anyone who is suffering and in need of help.

2. Awareness

Those who want to be healed or stay healthy need to regain their ability to recognize the emotional recognition of truth. Mindfulness means restoring our ability to perceive emotional reality. Except that we are not strong enough to face the truth about our lives.paralyzingshows that we are ready to give up our faith. We practice to develop awareness; we need to pay attention to our inner states, learn to trust that these inner feelings say more than our own or other people’s words.

“What is our tone of voice, are our eyes open or closed, is our smile strained or relaxed, how do we feel…” Awareness is also a sign of stress in our body; It also means learning how our bodies tell us when our minds are missing clues.

3. Anger

The suppression of anger poses a serious danger to diseases, as it increases physiological stress. Suppressing anger increases the risk of disease, and expressing anger promotes recovery and prolongs survival. Many studies indicate that suppressing anger causes more stress than expressing it. Like the suppression of anger, its uncontrolled release also increases the release of abnormal, health-threatening emotions; the truth is healthy anger.

Anger does not require hostility. First, it is a physiological process that must be experienced and which has cognitive value; provides basic information. Since anger does not exist in a vacuum, if I feel anger, it must be a perceptional response on my part. This may indicate a loss in personal relationships or a threat of intrusion into my boundaries. If I allow myself to experience anger and think about what might have provoked it, I will gain greater power without hurting anyone. Depending on the circumstances, I can somehow express my anger or get rid of it. The key is that I didn’t suppress it. I can express my anger with words or actions as needed, but I don’t have to express it as strongly as uncontrollable anger. Healthy anger makes a person responsible, not unbridled emotions.

4. Autonomy

From all the examples in history, personal stories and our work, it follows that people suffer when their boundaries are blurred. Disease itself is a matter of boundaries; When we look at studies examining who is more likely to get sick, those who experience the most severe boundary violations before they can form an autonomous sense of self are most at risk. The disease-causing immune complex reflects the inability to distinguish self from non-self. Thus, healing involves establishing or restoring the boundaries of the autonomous self. Ask yourself: “What do I want in my life and relationships, what do I want more or less, what do I not want, what are my limits?” Demand starts the process. In this self-definition, we define what we value, what we want, at an internal reference point; The locus of control is within ourselves. Thus, autonomy is a development of this center of internal control.

5. Application

Attachment is our connection to the world. From the first years of life, we gain or lose the ability to be open in our attachments, nourish ourselves, stay healthy; we learn to fear or suppress anger, we develop a sense of autonomy, otherwise we become dull. This is why commitment is vital to recovery. Studies show that lonely people without social contacts are at greater risk of disease; People with real emotional support are more likely to recover, regardless of illness.

Sometimes it’s easier for us to avoid attachment and feel pain, anger, because that hurts in the first place. However, there is no need to run away from attachment or be afraid of being broken. We are no longer helplessly dependent children; we are not weak because we need others; We are strong to build bonds that can overcome our fears and frustrations. We can afford to challenge the belief that we are “unattractive.” Finding connections is essential for healing.

6. Approval

Beyond acceptance and awareness, beyond the experience of anger and the emergence of autonomy, comes “affirmation” with the celebration of our capacity for attachment and our conscious search for contact: it is a declaration of who we are to ourselves and to the world. “We are who we are.”

Self-manifestation is deeper than the limited autonomy of any action. The expression of our existence is our positive appreciation of ourselves, regardless of our history, personality, abilities, or perception of the world around us. It challenges our belief that we have to somehow justify our existence; It requires neither action nor reaction. It is a phenomenon independent of action, even the opposite of action; because self-affirmation is not just a refusal to do something that we do not want to do, but also a release from the very need to act.

7. Confirmation

When we affirm something, we make a positive statement. Here are two basic affirmations that help us heal and stay whole if we can keep them. First, it is our own creative self. Everyone has an impulse to be creative; Expressions can flow in a personal way through many channels such as writing, art, music, cooking, gardening. The goal is to honor the momentum. It heals ourselves and others; Failure to do so kills our bodies and souls.

Last, It is the Universe itself and our connection to it. Getting rid of the illusion that we are separate beings from the universe is one of the key steps to healing. This is our connection; the assumption that we are alone, out of touch, is toxic; This assumption should be avoided. The feeling that we are separate from the universe is false and very easy to recognize; We don’t go from “ashes to ashes”; We are all dust that comes to life. That is, we are part of the universe with temporary consciousness, but we are never separated from the universe.

If you want to view and buy the related book, you can click: When the Body Says No: The Cost of Hidden Stress

You may be interested in: Causes of addiction in adolescence according to Gabor Mathe