Do we always have to be good?


psychological well-being and self-knowledge have been at the center of my work for many years. However, I think we need to understand what wellbeing is. According to the literature, the components of psychological well-being are; self-acceptance, positive relationships with others, autonomy, personal growth, purpose in life and mastery in the environment. Environmental mastery is defined as the ability to control and manipulate complex environmental conditions. We are going through times when we experience these “difficult environmental conditions” most intensely. Actually, this is nothing new. Exactly a century ago, at this time, we emerged from the great world war and, in addition, fought a tough fight against the imperialist powers with limited resources. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not going to stress that what we’re going through right now is less important. My goal,there are no problems in the world and nothing in the world should upset usin the direction look at our unrealistic expectations.

Since we live in an age of industry, consumption and marketing, the inability to endure “bad” conditions, illness and failure turns the main wheels of this system. to feel yourself bad” In this environment where it is constantly emphasized that it is very bad, even a disease, I think that getting the right information and protecting our perception is more important than anything else. As a mental health professional, concepts such as anxiety, depression, and trauma should not be used casually, every negative emotion and process should not be labeled as a disease, and the transient nature of “suffering”, which is a very human process, is defined as “disease” or “very bad”. I feel compelled to describe how he distorts our perception, defining it as “anything” and making people almost “be afraid to be afraid.” As a starting point in this article, I will consider concepts such as perception, subjective experience and consciousness. But first, let’s look at where these concepts are directly related – in the human brain.

The human brain is the only creature that was born incomplete from birth. This means that the brain is an organ that is constantly changing and shaping under the influence of the environment and life experience. The brain in the process of development is both embodied and relational, that is, a dynamic system. Through integration, the nervous system becomes regular and balanced. It is a product of brain integrated circuits that perform a regulatory function. All these circuits form a complex system, and the brain/mind is trying to understand only with the help of arithmetic and non-deterministic mathematics, which is called “complex systems theory”. Complex systems theory is based on probability theory, a branch of mathematics. If we are talking about an unfinished human being, we cannot talk about certainty, so we can only talk about probability. According to this point of view, a complex system is a “complex system” that arises from the interaction of the elements of the system.self-organization” peculiarity.

Our experiences, which we call emotions, are also a dimension of this self-organizing function, reflecting changes in states of integration. Thus, our emotional life forms the basis of our mind. The communication system we call the mind flow of energy and information. In this context, there are two fundamental irreducible aspects of our human existence. The first is the subjectivity of mental life, and the other is an objective (measurable) property of nervous life (the brain). The most basic function of the mind is to control and regulate the flow of energy and information. when editing something make observations and make changes to what is being edited needs. These are the two main elements of regulation. While driving, we need to keep our eyes open to understand where we are going and change direction and speed accordingly. At work, we also analyze our internal state by regulating our emotions, and then we change the level of arousal in order to maintain life balance. The good news is that if we use this regulatory function of our mind correctly, we can improve our family, relationships, and our lives. Well, if awareness and observation in this way can change lives, What do we know about consciousness? Come now what does consciousness mean let’s look at it.

In this article, I will use the word “consciousness” to refer to the experience of awareness, the inner state of being aware that something is happening right now. Before talking about consciousness, we need to accept the fact that we cannot objectively and numerically measure our mental life in its entirety. Even as we develop the regulating and integrating function of our mind, we have the immeasurable quality of being aware of our inner subjective experiences. This means that your inner mental experience cannot be fully known to me or anyone else. So there is no other equivalent of your inner world and mine. We can never fully reveal the true nature of our inner world to other people, and we cannot expect them to fully understand it.

Many recent studies in particular have raised many important and difficult questions to be answered, and have shown that the mind can be more than “products” of the brain. Gestalt psychology, which I mentioned in a previous article, emphasizes this issue in the early 1900s and says:the whole is greater than the sum of the partshe said. Perception, consciousness, and subjective experience have also been major areas of study in Gestalt psychology. Given what I have already explained, the mind is part of a process involving the regulation of energy and information flow, we can define the brain as the embodied mechanism of this flow, and relationships as sharing this flow. Here they are “consciousness” and “subjectivity” It creates the integral parts of the whole, which we call the elements of the reality of the information flow, namely you.

Although we define consciousness as the experience of awareness, the inner state of being aware that something is happening right now, we cannot consciously know everything. But we can focus on what we can be aware of, because awareness also allows us to make conscious choices. Because the information that enters our mind is important. If this information is expected and deterministic, it inevitably distorts our perception. For example, if you are told that “feeling bad” or having bad thoughts in your mind is very bad, especially if you hear it from the mouth of “experts”, of course you will have an unrealistic expectation, such as “I should never feel bad If I feel bad, then I’m sick. Can we label emotions as “good” and “bad” if the quality of your internal subjective experience of seeing red is not even exactly the same as my perception of the same red?

At this point, I would like to share a recollection quoted by Daniel Siegel, Professor of Clinical Psychiatry. Siegel once got into an argument with a practitioner who felt that psychiatrists should not study psychotherapy due to lack of scientific evidence that emotions are “real”, and to this practitioner who claims that emotions are not “real”, Siegel replies: “I don’t know how to continue the discussion because we don’t have any scientific proof of what is ‘real’.” Do you understand why the discussion here is not going anywhere? This discussion will get nowhere, because it is against the nature of life and human nature to try to measure what we all experience in a unique way, namely perception as a phenomenon, in order to speak with confidence about the changing structure. Because when it comes to people, we can only talk about possibilities. In conclusion, if there is a difference between “what is” and our “perception” of it, and it cannot be measured in absolute terms for everyone, it may be because you or others (anxious, depressed) who suggest that you are sick, bad, incomplete, and that if you feel bad it will be terrible, I recommend that you be skeptical of any posts that classify them as toxic, narcissistic, etc.).

If you would like the support of a counseling psychologist on this matter, please contact me for information on the process. [email protected] can be contacted by email.

Source: Daniel J. Siegel. Mind development: how the interplay between relationships and the brain makes us. Publications of the Institute for Psychotherapeutic Education No: 253.

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